mom stuff

Samantha loves Penny-I know I should be eternally grateful that I have such a wonderful person to watch our little girl and that Sam adores her. Don’t get me wrong, I count my blessing every single day- but, every day I have to fight this intense feeling of guilt and jealousy. I am jealous of the woman that watches our child. Jealous of the 9-10 hours a day she gets to spend with my little girl. Jealous of the meal times, snack times, play times, craft times, cuddle times and all the cute things I miss. I get, at most, two hours of good time with Samantha at night. Most of that time is spent making dinner and getting ready for bed. I miss her so dang much ALL week.
Penny lives across the street from us…so every morning I walk her across the street and then I walk back home. She waves and blows kisses as I walk back. I can’t help but wonder if she thinks I take her over there and then just go back home and hang out without her….
In a perfect world I would be the one kissing her booboos and fixing her lunch. For now, I need to focus on how sweet and perfect the time I do get to spend with her is.